I find it funny when people describe people that they loath or cannot be around but I find it equally as hilarious when people think that a single person is supposed to have all the qualities, personalities, and interests of everything, everyone, and every possible habit in the world. I look at people wondering, if I were all of the things that you want me to be, would it be good enough? My character has become in question, even by some of my closest friends. Sheltered is one that bugs me the most. I have never really understood why that has become such a problem. My family has been through struggles, maybe not to your standards or experiences of yours, but have been through some. It is my fault that my mother wanted to take me out of the ghetto and show me a new world. Growing up, she had nothing but a farm and a 2 bedroom house for 5 people. When she left Virginia, she wanted a better way of life. Does that mean she is sheltered? I didn't go to private school or have money for the finest things in life, like I have seen some "sheltered" black kids have (the white friends, private school, living in the county, and do not know what real work is) . What I have now, I worked hard for just like the rest of America. But I am still sheltered? What do I have to be not to be sheltered? What view on life do I have to be to please you? Am I supposed to talk in slang? Am I supposed to have a story of growing up in the ghetto? Are members of my family supposed to have been in jail? Do all of my friends have to be black? Compared to the way I was back in the beginning of high school, ignorant based on my mother's beliefs of black people and thinking they are all out to get me, I think I have come a long way. I try to understand people the best way I can but I cannot if you are consistently bashing the way I was brought up or consistently saying I will never understand. I can not understand something in less you explain. I can not learn if you do not teach me. I am the type of person who learns from experience and the experiences of the people around me but if you are so hell bent in leaving me in a stereotype, which is sheltered, I will never understand or learn. It makes me angry when people think they are better than me because they have been through more or seen more. If anything, you should be out in the world helping me to understand what you have been through instead of judging me because I have not been through the same things you have. I do not sit around and get mad at people who have not been through the same struggles I have had in the past nor do I want pity for it. But yet when I bring up some struggles I have had, they are being compared to someone else's story. Each struggle is different and hurts on different levels. How can you sit there and think you are worst off in life because you have been through more. It sickens me. If anything you should be rejoicing that you made it.
We, as a black community, will never get anywhere if we continue to bash our own people. All people, even white, Indian, Asian, African, are different from the culture that they were brought up in. If every person were to stay true only to their race and only care about what is going in their race, the world would not to be in unity, (even though sometimes it's not, but it's better than nothing!). If you are sitting around expecting every black person of the African-American race to live the same, think the same, and the support the same values, you are a dumb ass. You are ignorant and you aren't going to get in anywhere in life because you are so stuck up Afro Pride's ass that you are too blind to see that there are other people in this world who are not Black! Yes, I believe there should be unity between us black people because at the end of the day, we need each other to survive and yes, the white man did keep us down in the past but you have to start pulling the black card and work hard for yourself. Of course, there still be racial tension but if you sit around trying to talk about it all day and not get anything accomplished, where are you going to go? There are successful black people in America who did it the right way, working hard and staying true to themselves and not getting caught up in the black race thinking that the white man is going to keep them down, but pushed the limits. The only people that care about us are us! But you guys are so busy bashing out other black people who have different qualities or interests than your self-righteous, egoistic, "I'm so black and proud" bias ways. Look in the mirror for once. Try picking our your own flaws. Try looking after yourself and start loving yourself because you start calling me out. There is a reason why I am different from you, because I'm not you.
I just wonder, what do you want me to do? What do you want me to be like? How do you want me to sound? How do you want me to think? How am I supposed to live my life? And how do I stop you from judging me?
